Thursday, May 10, 2012

Another cup of coffee...


I realize that I've got to make some more coffee if I want to feel at all better than I do now. It will be a last ditch effort. It is the only thing I know to do that I think will help. It is either that, or crawl back into bed. I'm not exactly in the mood for that because it is too early in the day for a nap. I've got to find another way to cheer up.

I woke up this morning with a headache and pain in my neck and shoulders, so that was not a good beginning to the day. I also felt very stressed and my thoughts raced through my mind almost from the minute I got up. They jumped from one subject to the other at amazing speeds. I don't know what to blame that on.

I seemed to do a bit better after I took my medicines but that may have all been in my magination. I don't think I have really improved that much. I'm a bit calmer now maybe. 

I have to try and find the magic formula to peacefulness. I know that I am capable of this because I have felt it in the past. It may have been quite by chance that I felt it but I know it exists. If I do everything just right, maybe I will feel it again. Writing these thoughts down helps a lot too. 

Sometimes I find it very difficult to be me, especially when I can't find my peace and quiet. When they are so elusive that I'm left with nothing but free floating anxiety. 

I've had my first cup of coffee and I feel somwhat better now. I suppose that was a good choice then. It's straightening out my head to some extend. 

I was supposed to do some paperwork today that I have been putting off and have not yet found the right moment for. It's not very complicated but does require me to pay attention and it is a responsible job. I can't do it when I'm stressed. It literally makes me sick just thinking about it. I will put it off until this weekend when I will feel less pressure on me. 

Yesterday, as if by some miracle, I started reading a book. It is one I got for Christmas on the workings of the brain. I hope it keeps continuing to capture me and that I will finish it. So far it is interesting but I won't be able to concentrate on it if I feel this amount of stress. I will make myself sit down and try to read it again today for about an hour. Anything to do with the brain is fascinating to me. 

First I will find some other relaxing activities to do behind the computer. The dog has stopped bothering me and has gone to sleep. I was waiting for that to happen. He's a little spoiled sometimes and won't eat his kibbles. 

I hope you're all having a good day.

Ciao,
Irene


4 comments:

CorvusCorax12 said...

i hope the book helps...we are having gloomy, very rainy weather. We need the rain though.

Gail said...

The paperwork is causing it! Just do it and it will be done and then you can relax.

Have a wonderful day.

Maggie May said...

Paper work always depresses me too but it is a great feeling when it is all done & dusted.
Hope you feel fine soon.
Still waiting for some good weather. Hoping you are having better but the forecast didn't look good your way either.
Maggie X

Nuts in May

Wisewebwoman said...

I too have been paying no attenton to my own pwork with the result that I have 4 months to catch up on.
Started today. Hate it. But if not now, when?
With you in spirit and coffee.
XO
WWW